Turn to the left………Turn to the right.

Another mercifully quiet week, another post to address a weird ass trend of dressing up your dog. Aaaaaand here is my stance. No. NO. NOPE!

I mean .. why would you? Your dog has a perfectly beautiful coat which has the added function of keeping your dog both warm in winter and cool in summer – even if they are single coated!! Why hide it?

And it’s not just dressing your dog. What’s with the sunglasses?, the hats?, the bloody push chairs, buggies, prams etc? Last time I checked a dog has four legs, who is environmentally, evolutionary and biologically designed to walk, see in the dark and have the very logical common sense to sit in the bloody shade if it gets too hot! As someone who does not like nature (effing otter), dogs are a wonder of nature and so evolutionary marvelous – why would you want to dress them up like a doll?!! Arrrrrrrrggghh…!!!

There is simply no excuse for dressing up your dog and so help me if your response is..kawaaaaiiiii…

By dressing up your dog you are making them neurotic and incapable of being and behaving as a dog. The barking, nervous behaviour, the stress – oh holy fudge sticks of the alcohol variety – the stress – you cause that. YOU. Your dog does not deserve that in any way shape or form. And for the love of all that is alcohol and chocolate do not dress up your dog, push it in a pram, put sunglasses on it – at night!- like a dog version if the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. You should have your dog taken away from you for animal cruelty. Yes I’ve seen it, yes I was judgy and moreover pissed at the owner. Stop fostering your own insecurities and lack of emotional well being onto your dog. Go and see a therapist. Seriously – its gonna be cheaper than buying those abominations called dog clothes.

The pet stores here in Japan are not actual pet stores. They are a nightmare of an abomination of horrors of frills, coats, booties and hats for your dog (read: all together now…. kawaaaaaiiii!!). Oh yeah.There are frills. Seriously all horror movies are less nightmare inducing than a pet store in Japan. The first time I walked into a pet store I thought I was in a store for babies and newborns until my friend pointed out the pet treats…. simply a horror of an unimaginable scale which haunts me three years on. Three years people!!!

Needless to say, Sas does not have anything like that. At. All. In fact the only clothes he has are the ones he so avidly chewed through when he first came to live with me – which were mine. And now they are his. As with everything in my life what was once mine and mine alone, they are now Sasukes and what is Sasukes – stays Sasukes. I’m happy to report not a frill, bootie, hat or dress in site. Just a hoodie and pajama set – he’s very co-ordinated orientated like that.

But what about when it rains or my dog is old and cant walk for long anymore? I hear you shout. Well. Now I may be going out on a limb here but if your dog is of an age where walking a long time is an issue – here’s a thought – change the length of your walk to your dogs ability and BOOM! problem fixed. As for the rain – BUY A BATH TOWEL AND DRY YOUR DOG when you get home!! BOOM! fixed again!

So. In conclusion, from someone of only few words on the topic…..

STOP playing doggy dress up!